Training for triathlon, specifically the IM, is a balancing act. I'm married with 3 kids and work full-time. There are 168 hours in a week. Managing each hour has become a science for me. I've found that I need to manage my time down to 15 minute increments. I have very little down time during the week. I'm usually up by 4 am to get my first workout of the day done before 6:30 am. I'm a teacher so my job allows me to workout in the early afternoon without interrupting anything my family does. My wife also works full-time so I need to do my fair share around the house. I'll cook and do the food shopping. When I get home in the afternoon, dinner needs to be started so we can eat when my wife gets home.
In order to work, have a family and train you need two important elements. First and foremost, you need to have a spouse that is unbelievably patient. My wife is an angel for tolerating this crazy lifestyle. Secondly, you need to make working out a priority. If that means you need to get up at 3:45 am to get a workout in, then do it. I promised my wife that I would never let training get in the way of family plans. I have woken up at ungodly hours just to get workouts in and still make a 9 am soccer game. I have always found ways to make it work. Training and racing are not worth it if it means forgetting your family. Time management is the key. My coach has my workouts done by time and not distance. It allows for simple planning and I know exactly when I'll be finished. Figure out your goals, come up with a schedule and stick to it. It is possible to train and race, have a family and work full-time. Let me know if you have any secrets that work for you.